... for those who mourn the loss of a soul mate
"He felt now that he was not simply close to her, but that he did not know where he ended and she began." - Leo Tolstoy

Saturday, July 20, 2019

Surround yourself with love

This world can be a harsh place.
Don't misunderstand - I love our world. It's filled with beauty and fantastic animals and [for the most part] wonderful people.
But life on Earth can be hard. That's why we chose to come here. And we chose to come here at this particular time to learn and to contribute.
But there's no getting around it - it's hard work and it's soul-draining at times.
And for those of us who are especially sensitive, it's just plain overwhelming.
But take heart. There is still beauty and love out there.
And it's our job to be it, offer it, and surround ourselves with it.
That's what I have been doing these last few days and I can already feel the difference.
I am making sure I meditate every day. The peace I find when I connect with Source can not be put into mere words. My soul feels recharged. I highly recommend it. Those 15 minutes or so of quiet contemplation whether in silence or during a guided meditation are priceless.
I am also learning to scroll faster on Facebook and not engage as much as I used to. Standing up for beliefs is wonderful and admirable but some days you just have to say "Oh, well" and scroll on. Peace of mind is worth it. We are not the Idiot Whisperers.
A news fast is also a good thing every now and then.
And I have found my newest bestest thing - YouTube on my TV.
I recently purchased a new smart TV for my living room. 55 inches of glorious color that I just realized I can play YouTube videos on.
Now my home is filled with hours of high definition videos of underwater and beach tranquility. It takes me back to the days when my husband and I snorkeled in the Bahamas.
Colorful fish, undulating plants, the sound of music or water crashing on the shore.
Pure Heaven.
And what it does for my soul!
Instant peace.
The world drifts away and I can pretend it doesn't exist. I can recharge.
My living room has become a haven for me. My dog and cats, a good book, the sound of water - what more could a weary soul ask for ?
I encourage you to find your own Heaven on Earth as well. We are here to make the world better but we also need space to make ourselves better. Balance is the answer.

Thursday, July 18, 2019

Every Moment Counts

This week, I have attended two funerals. One was for a friend of many years. His death was unexpected as he had always been active and in apparently good health despite being in his mid-eighties. A freak accident resulted in his being taking far too soon from his family. The other was the husband of a friend. I never knew him, but I know he was much loved and his death from a long illness was not as unexpected as with our other friend.

I found myself wondering yet again which is preferable, being caught unprepared for death or seeing it coming over months or years. In the final moments, the final days, does it really make a difference? Both deaths are painful for those who are left behind. With the longer death, I suppose you can say those remaining have already been able to grieve for some measure of time, but the ultimate finality of knowing the person you love is completely, irrevocably gone from the here and now is the same, whether you have had time to prepare or not. You still grieve. Deeply.

With that in mind, I think we must make every moment of a life with someone we love count. Take time to savor quiet moments together. Laugh. Dance. See life’s wonder through one another’s eyes. Experience the joy of the love you share. Never forget your time together is precious, no matter how many years you have. Once those moments are gone, you can never get them back. You can only treasure the ones you have right now. Turn away from the petty annoyances of a world too often callous and uncaring. Release your anger and frustrations when they come as they inevitably will. Instead, say I love you. Say it again. And again.

Monday, July 15, 2019

Can You Feel the Music?

Music has always been elusive to me. I took piano lessons the year I was 10 and viola lessons my sophomore year in high school. Unfortunately, for me, reading music is akin to looking at hieroglyphics. I have music reading dyslexia. I’m also tone deaf. In school assemblies, I was encouraged not to sing. They usually let me be the announcer. When I sing at home, my dogs bark and leave the room—everyone is a critic. My husband would exhibit astonishment when I managed to get through “Silent Night” mostly on key. Both my father and my husband were singers. My mother played the church organ and had a lovely soprano voice. My brother was a song writer. Rhythm should be in my genes.

When I reflect on the different stages and aspects of my life, there is always a sound track. Sometimes it’s commercial ditties that stick in the brain like Pop, pop, fizz, fizz... Other times, perhaps while grocery shopping, my ears will pick up the refrain of “Hallelujah,” a beautiful love song that gives me goosebumps and makes my heart swell. I get the same bodily responses when listening to “The Star-Spangled Banner,” or the main theme from Star Wars. I walked down the aisle to “MacArthur Park.” “Bridge Over Troubled Water” was my anthem in the 70s. I associate certain genres of music with people I’ve loved and lost. My husband liked dramatic ground-shaking classical music along with big band songs, but “Unchained Melody” was his favorite song to sing to me. I can’t listen to that song without crying. My twin-soul brother was a concert pianist who loved singing pop and country songs. My dear cousin was addicted to Rush. And “She’s My Little Whiskey Girl” brings my brother close. When I hear the music that they loved and shared with me, I can feel their vibrations and know they are listening with me.

I’m upgrading my smartphone because the current one is a little tired and less smart than the new model, and I love me a new techno toy. With this imminent phone upgrade, I decided to sort my music into different categories:
Music as Shock Therapy
Music Like a Splash of Cold Water
Music for Relaxation
Music for Quietude
Music for Mourning
Music for Morning After
Music for Dancing—Ballroom and Boogie
Music for Speed-Rolling in My Powerchair
Music to Sleep To
Music to Sleep Around To

These tunes will either be lost or transferred to the SD card on the new phone. I got a flash that maybe the new blank SD card is an opportunity to build new playlists. Perhaps it’s an invitation to explore new artists and embrace wider music genres for the backdrop of the life I’m now living. I've  thought it over and realize I’m not ready to drop the old familiar soundtrack of my life for a brand new one. I think I will transfer all the songs to the new card and add more as I continue to feel the music.

Music is a moral law. It gives soul to the universe, wings to the mind, flight to the imagination, and charm and gaiety to life and to everything. –Plato