... a voice for those who mourn the loss of a soul mate
"He felt now that he was not simply close to her, but that he did not know where he ended and she began." - Leo Tolstoy

Wednesday, October 18, 2017

Love lives on!

And, no, I am not crazy. We do indeed still have a relationship with them. We have lost our soul mate to death. But we have not lost our soul mate. That is my message.
There is not only life after death.
There is life with our soul mate after death.
That bears repeating –
There is life with our soul mate after death.
No, it’s not the same. Death is real, after all. 
But death is a transition, not an end. 
Our loved ones are alive, just no longer physically with us on the three-dimensional plane of existence on the planet we call Earth. That is what I have learned and what I want to pass on to you.*

Love lives on!

*Excerpted from I Will Never Leave You: A soul mate's promise by Joy Collins

Sunday, October 15, 2017

There Is Hope. You Will Laugh Again

When someone you love and cherish deeply dies, you are left with reminders that seem to constantly bombard you from every side. A certain song, a television program, a scent, a hat, a favorite food. Even a stranger in the distance who walks a certain way. It can be anything.

Hit with an unexpected memory or reminder, you can be sure tears will fall and your heart will ache. At least at first when you are mourning most deeply. You will never forget, but in time the memories will stop being sad reminders of what is gone. Instead, they will become triggers for remembering all the beautiful and good things that built a life of love.

In a 2012 speech to families of fallen soldiers, Vice President Joe Biden talked about the constant weight of grief he experienced after losing his wife and daughter in a car crash. He said, "Just when you think, ‘Maybe I’m going to make it,’ you’re riding down the road and you pass a field, and you see a flower and it reminds you. Or you hear a tune on the radio. Or you just look up in the night. You know, you think, ‘Maybe I’m not going to make it, man.' Because you feel at that moment the way you felt the day you got the news." He offered a ray of hope, saying, "There will come a day – I promise you, and your parents as well – when the thought of your son or daughter, or your husband or wife, brings a smile to your lips before it brings a tear to your eye," Biden says. "It will happen."

There is no timeline for when you must stop grieving your loss. But at some point, you will begin to move on naturally. That’s not to say you will forget the love you have lost. That will be with you for the rest of your life. The grief does not completely go away either but in time there will be room for other things. You will begin to live, to breathe, even to laugh again. If you were a healthy, feeling person before, so you can be once more.

Tuesday, October 3, 2017

There are no coincidences

"There are no coincidences."
How many times in my metaphysical journey have I heard that statement? Many times. Almost to the point that it has become meaningless.
Then something happens and it stops me in my tracks and I smile and think "Okay, you got me there. I need to pay attention more often."
This past week was just such an epiphany.
I'm sure most of you know my book is titled I Will Never Leave You and a little stone angel is prominent in one of the stories in my book and eventually inspired the title.
I had a beautiful coincidence surrounding that little angel this past week.
A woman who had read my book emailed me. She wrote that my book touched her heart as she had also lost her husband. They had been married 61 years. I can only imagine the loss she feels.
She told me she was deeply attracted to the stone angel. Its message spoke to her and she wanted to know where she could get one.
She felt it would comfort her as it does me.
I emailed her back with the information of where I had found it. But that had been way back in 2010. I had no idea if the store still had them.
And, as it turned out, they in fact no longer carried it.
Then this past Sunday I attended my Church in Scottsdale and suddenly felt the desire to browse in their gift shop after Mass.
Lo and behold they had a basket full of the same little angel for sale!
I was thrilled.
I immediately bought one for my new friend. I couldn't wait to get home to let her know.
As you can imagine, she was so happy.
I dropped it in the mail to her yesterday.
I just know in my heart that her dear husband nudged me that morning because he wanted to be able to tell her that he was still with her, still loving her, and they would be together again.
I am honored and blessed to be used by him in that way.
He got his message to her but he also got a message to me, too.
There are no coincidences.

Sunday, October 1, 2017

Finding My Soul Mate with a Little Help from the Afterlife

For most of my life, I was reasonably indifferent to the afterlife. I believed there was something there, but I never really paid much attention to what was there. In my youth, I suppose, I felt pretty much invulnerable and so the afterlife really did not merit much thought. Until, that is, two of my best friends educated me and people I loved started to die. All of a sudden, I began to be aware of signs from the other side. The coincidences were just a few too many to ignore. I simply could no longer write the signs off as coincidence.

In looking back, I am convinced that some of the past “coincidences” were actually messages. I just wrote them off as serendipitous happenstance.

Since my mother died when I was 12, I have known on some level that she was watching over me. I once had a roommate who I now know was most likely a quiet medium. She once saw my mother and gave me a message from her. It’s a convoluted tale but the bottom line is that my mother was trying to tell me that I was dating the wrong guy. That relationship, thankfully, eventually failed and I moved on.

But it wasn’t until this week that I made a huge connection that showed me she has also sent me signs directly. I just never realized what they were.

I recently found myself telling someone how I did not know until the day of my wedding (May 25) that it was also my parents’ anniversary. Now, my parents were high school sweethearts who clearly married right after graduating. I am convinced they were soul mates. When she died, my father was devastated and even though he remarried a year later, I don’t think he ever completely got over his grief.

Why did we select that specific day? Other than the convenience of having a holiday weekend to give us a longer honeymoon, I have no explanation. We could have picked the 24th or the 26th. We did not. I choose to believe my mother was guiding that choice. 44 years later, I think it was her way of telling me that I had made the right choice, that this man would be steady and love me for the long term, that he was, finally, the soul mate I had been seeking.