... a voice for those who mourn the loss of a soul mate
"He felt now that he was not simply close to her, but that he did not know where he ended and she began." - Leo Tolstoy

Friday, December 22, 2017

Happy holidays - or not

The holidays are hard for those of us who are mourning the loss of loved ones.
My advice for you is to honor that feeling. Allow yourself the space to do what you need to do for yourself.
It is all right to do so. In fact, it is necessary.
Almost two weeks ago, I lost my beautiful Aunt Mary. Aunt Mary was my mother's sister, my aunt, my Godmother, my second mother - and in some respects, my true mother. She was always there for me, showering me with unconditional love.
The loss I feel at losing her is rivaled only by the pain of losing John, my soul mate.
So, Christmas is going to be very understated this year.
And that's okay. People will understand. And if they don't, it's not my problem.
I have made plans to do essentially nothing this holiday time. I will go to Church, rent some movies, and surround myself with my furbabies.
My soul needs TLC and that is what it will get.
If you are mourning and the holidays feel like just too much for you, I urge you to do the same - whatever that means for you.
Go out when you want to.
If you are around people, feel free to honor your loved one - share memories, say their name, don't feel guilty if you want to laugh - or cry.
Or stay home when that feels right.
Eat ice cream in front of the TV.
Curl up with a good book.
Watch cheesy holiday movies on TV.
The holidays are only days. You will get through them.
We all will.
Soon it will be a new year and we will march forward, carrying our loved ones in our hearts and helping those who also mourn.
That's my plan.
I will most likely be on Facebook over this time - who am I kidding? Of course, I will. :)
Reach out to me if you feel so inclined.
But most of all, know that you are not alone.
Your loved ones are with you.
Those who care about you are with you.
You can do this.

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