... for those who mourn the loss of a soul mate
"He felt now that he was not simply close to her, but that he did not know where he ended and she began." - Leo Tolstoy

Monday, September 9, 2019

Live It or Lose It

“I'm not afraid of death because I don't believe in it. It's just getting out of one car, and into another.” – John Lennon

Are you participating in your life or merely gliding through, letting each day escape from your grasp? Are you in charge of your life or just giving it away an hour at a time? When we lose the person our life revolved around, we can get stuck in a morass of doubt, indecision, and apathy.

When someone close to you dies, your social status often changes. This affects your sense of self-worth. Losing a life partner often results in a reduction of income and can mean having to move out of a shared home or having to reach out to others for financial help, which can further increase emotional stress and worry. The stress of losing a loved one to death and the resulting grief can weaken your immune system and make you more vulnerable to catching colds or the flu. Poor eating habits and disrupted sleep patterns can lead to queasiness, low-energy levels, fatigue, and weakness in overall muscle strength. Stress can also worsen an existing chronic health condition, causing it to flare up repeatedly.

It is so easy when you lose your anchor to allow yourself to just drift. The danger is, you don’t always drift into calm waters. Chances are a storm will come along and throw you up against the rocks or try to submerge you. Draw on your memories that reflect the love you shared in your relationship. Use them to form a life vest when waves of despair and doubt threaten to overwhelm you. And when friends reach out, grab their hands, and allow them to pull you in.

I don’t find the term “closure” helpful. Bank accounts are closed, closet doors are closed, shutters are closed, but the love we carry for those closest to us never closes. You can never go back to being your “old self” after a traumatic loss. Grief changes you, and you are never the same. However, you do get to decide how to put yourself back together. Be strong. Be creative. Live your life as a journey not as a race. I believe our Creator put us here to do a job, to learn lessons, and to enhance the lives of others. 
Peace and love.
If you know someone this blog could help, please share.

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